c&c is suck in my heeeeead

[tenel_ka]

So I still don't know wtf is going on with this pain. I've been to my doctor twice, two specialists (three times altogether) and the freakin' hospital. And everyone is just sort of like, "Duuhhhh whattttt"

I don't have any leave left at at work thanks to all these damn appointments and tests so I am about 95% sure I will have to cancel my California trip (and lose all the money that will be non-refundable from airline tickets and shit). I am pretty pissed off about it all. And to top it all off, I'M STILL IN PAIN. :|

I've been trying to focus on creative things (costumes, websites, fanfiction) to make myself feel better but I can't really focus on anything at all usually because of the pain. I have to lay a certain way to get any sleep, I have to stand up and walk around cause if I sit too long it hurts -- piiiisssssssssssed off.

I mean, I wrote a beginning to the ZOMG HORROR SW FIC I have actually been excited about and I don't know if I like it or not. I have been second guessing myself on it. IT'S LIKE THREE PARAGRAPHS LONG AND I AM HAVING FULL ON DEBATES WITH MYSELF ABOUT IT. WHAT IS THIS, SELF? THIS IS FANFICTIONNNNNNNNN WHATTTTTTTT. This is making me do silly things.

So I told myself today in a motivational fashion, I said, "Heather, you are more awesome than this pain. You can get shit done and kick the pain in the ass somehow. It will go away. You will be able to do stuff besides stare at the ceiling while being all sprawled out on the couch."

(Don't ask me where pain got an ass from. D:)

After all that monologuing with myself, I decided that I WILL focus on other things (dammit) and I WILL get all my creative crap done. This means writing, costumes, buttons, websites and making all the damn jewelry I've wanted to make with the random pieces that are piling up around me.

STUFF. IT WILL BE DONE.

Comments

[rjsteamboat76.livejournal.com]

i wanna read ze sw horror!fic. we need more horror in sw. =)

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

I keep questioning what I've written of it so far and I'm not sure why. I'm thinking I'll just start posting it and stop second guessing myself about it (I think the pain/perc is making me silly, hehe). D: SW HORROR! <333 woo!

[rjsteamboat76.livejournal.com]

yes, stop questioning yourself and start posting! =D

[blood-sorbet.livejournal.com]

I would tell you to embrace the pain, but.

:X

*HUG*

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha, as much as I hurt, that totally still made me LOLOLOLOL~ <33333333 *huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuug!*

[mafiaprincess.livejournal.com]

Sorry to hear you're in pain gal! *hugs*

Btw, about Balticon... will you be arriving Fri or Sat? My boyfriend and I will probably only be able to do Sat + Sun, hence I'm wondering about the room and all. I'm sure we'll still work something out. ;)

and LOLOLOL that pain has an ass. Brilliant!!!

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

*huuuuuugs* I just want to feel normal again! UGH, it better be figured out/fixed/gone by Balticon!

I think we'll be getting there Friday night. Are you gonna be staying Sunday night, or just Saturday night? If you want to add my name to the room so I can check in and everything (and we will pay for Friday night and all that jazz~) just let me know. :D

(I AM SO EXCITED AND TRYING TO FINISH MY TOUCH UPS TO THE YJK OUTFIT AND FINISH THE QUEEN MOTHER OUTFIT DESPITE THIS STUPID PAAAAAAAAAAIN XD)

[mafiaprincess.livejournal.com]

*huggles* Get well soon dear!!!

We're only staying for Saturday night as he's got work on Monday and I have my internship on Monday. So the room is Fri-Sun. Would be great to add your name to the room, message me your full name and all that jazz please!

i'm STOKED too!

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

I will do that right now! :D

And thank you again~ <3333!

[suzll.livejournal.com]

*hugs you* I hope you feel better!!!

Also horror SW fic sounds awesome :)

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Thank you very much! I just want to feel normal again~! ;D

And I hope it turns out okay -- I've been a huge fan of both horror/ghost stories/that sort of thing and Star Wars for a long, long time now so I'm hoping to do them both justice!

[princessxion.livejournal.com]

that really sucks (the pain) :( *HUG* hope you feel better SOON ! and I look forward to see you creative projects ^__^

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

*huuuuuuuuugs* Thank you! And I hope the projects turn out okay even though I am distracted by this crazy paaaaain~ ;D

[omicron1337.livejournal.com]

That really bites about the vacation time. It would suck, but can you work late or something to make up the lost time? I had to do that when I got the flu last year. I hope somebody can figure out what the hell is going on, silly medical field.

ALSO, CRAFTY TIMES MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER for a little bit at least. DO EET.

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

Yesssssss, it makes me sad cause I was really excited and had everything all reserved uggggggggh. D: Usually I would be able to make up time, but there is so much time that I've lost that I can't make it all up before then. :(

And yeah, I'm hoping I will soon know wtf this is cause this is all getting really old. dkfskdjfkajdskf

I LOVE CRAFTY TIMES AND I WILL POST A PICTURE OF THE NECKLACE I MADE YESTERDAY LIKE YOU MENTIONED AS PROOF THAT I ACTUALLY GOT SOMETHING DONE :D

[lusa-thul.livejournal.com]

Sounds like someone needs to call Dr. House!

YOU NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT IS WRONG I WORRY ABOUT YOU!!!

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

YESSSSSSSS, WHERE IS HOUSE? D: And yeah, I really just want to know what it is so I can get it fixed and stop being distracted from EVERYTHING because of it. uggghhhhhhh

[bazula.livejournal.com]

Did they try checkin' out your gall bladder? :O There's this test that they can do to it that, if the pain matches the discomfort you're feeling, will tell them if your gall bladder's bad or not and then they CUT THAT BITCH OUT AND YOU'RE BETTER! I dunno I had similar problems :B And it took them forever to fix it until they did that.

[jk-birr.livejournal.com]

DEATH TO THAT WORTHLESS SACK OF DIGESTIVE JUICES!!


hey im no stranger to gut pain, so shoot me a message. they tested me for a lot of stuff before I figured out what was wrong.

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

SERIOUSLY I JUST WANT THE PAIN TO GO AWAAAYYYYYYY DAMNIT INSIDESSSSS!!!111

I definitely need to bug you about this then! Especially with all these tests they want to run/need to run/should run. It's like I feel like I'm running out of stuff that they will do and I don't know what type of doctor to turn to next!

[tenel-ka.livejournal.com]

They checked it for gall stones with an ultrasound and I'm going back to the GI next Tuesday which will hopefully lead to the scan (I forgot what it's called) that checks to see if the gall bladder is functioning right. UGGGGGGH. D:

It's like, if it's not my abdomen then it's my back or neck. ONE OR MORE OF THEM ALWAYS HURTSSSSSS. D:

THE ICON REPRESENTS HOW I FEEL ABOUT THE PAAAAAAAAIN~